More Travel

Posted under Thailand 2008

I know, I know, I have been very remiss in updating my blog and I apologize to those of you who have been sitting on the edge of your seat, with bated breath, awaiting the next thrilling episode of “old people traveling in Thailand”. I know that those nasty butt welts, caused by the edge of a chair, can be very aggravating. I would like to place all the blame on sketchy internet, but in truth, lethargy might enter into the picture.

At any rate, we left Khao Lak by car and traveled to Phuket airport. About an hours drive and 600 bht.(about $20.) Traveled through some major rubber plantations. Now when artificial rubber was developed about the time of WW ll, a high percentage of raw rubber was used in the manufacture of surgical gloves. One would have to wonder where all those proctologists might be working — but then, just think of all the politicians we have, just awaiting their service.

Traveled from Phuket to Bangkok in a 737, about an hour, for $100. US. Does not remind me of my travels to Dawson Creek in I think maybe a DC-3, via, I believe, Great Vulture Airlines, for about $800.US. Oh well.

Actually had quite a good time in Bangkok, did a lot of the touristy things and one of us managed to have our hair properly pouffed. The other of us doesn’t have enough hair to worry about. Took a tour to the Grand Palace and Wat Phra Kaew temple. Established in the 1780’s the palace is mostly ceremonial, but the temple is still active. Now it would seem that the monks have an aversion to hairy white legs, and as I fell into this category I was loaned a pair of brilliant colored pantaloons. It would seem that they take no offense to a good sense of humor, as I looked just like Bozo the clown. There was, of course, no one who enjoyed this more than Bonnie, and she was quick to point out that the rest of our tour group were also enjoying this situation. In their defense, they, at least, didn’t point their fingers and laugh out loud. At this point I would like to confirm that there is indeed a God, for on the following day we took a tour of another palace and yet another temple. On this occasion they not only took offense of the hairy white legs, but also did not care for exposed, fleshy shoulders and yes, they made Bonnie wear a table cloth and a brilliant yellow shirt. At this point she could have had a choice of continuing with the tour, or becoming a street vendor. She chose the tour, which may or may not have been the best choice. After looking in the royal digs and noticing the elevated temperature with the layered clothing, Bonnie took it upon herself to expose not only her legs, but her shoulders, for a walk about the grounds. She was soon set upon by the clothes nazi, who spotted her from a distance and soon overtook her on his bicycle. He stayed right there while Bonnie covered up the offending flesh. The bright red face which I displayed, was no indication of a pending cardiac situation, but was, in fact, the result of my trying desperately to stifle raucous laughter. Remember that not poking the bear bit? Of the 40,000 temples in Thailand, I suspect that we have seen most of them, so that when we head south I suspect that we will go to a mosque. Wait until they try to dress Bonnie in a burkha.

Also took a river trip in Bangkok on the Mae Nam Chao Praya river. You can say it in Thai. It sounds a great deal like clearing your throat several times. This is the largest river in Thailand, and is inter-connected with numerous canals or klongs. This accounted for Bangkok being known as the Venice of the east. Now this boat trip was aboard a long-tail boat. This is a rather long, but narrow vessel, capable or carrying probably twenty people. At the blunt end of the boat is a rather rickety frame to which is attached a used engine from a 1976 datsun pickup. On the transmission is a bloody long shaft with a two bladed propeller. On the fan end of the engine is another long shaft which a skinny little Thai helmsman swings on. It is his function to pivot this entire contraption from side to side in an effort to control the direction of said vessel. Either that or he is desperately hanging on to prevent being dumped into the klong, which can become somewhat odoriferous in spots. Did I mention that we also got to go to the day market, the night market, the weekend market and several large malls. It just doesn’t get much better than that.

Back to Phuket Island on the 737. Cost only $50. US on the return trip. Downhill I guess. Time to prepare for the much anticipated arrival of Troy and Chad, but that is another story, and another day.
T